| bummer summer |
[Apr. 18th, 2007|02:15 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bitchy | ] |
i'm already starting to regret my decision to maintain a very hectic summer schedule in order to augment my currently depleted savings account :p
because of this crazy hot and humid weather, i am now nursing an impossibly dry cough and incredibly hoarse voice (which came at a very inopportune time - just when i'm supposed to read the names of my graduating students). i'm dead tired and my mind's all a-blur. hmm. oh yeah.. i'm still not quite sure what to do with my summer classes, nyahahaha :p hooray for me!
but maybe all this busyness is a blessing in disguise. distractions from the main distractor, so to speak. hmm. i dunno. let's just wait and see.. |
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| handing it over |
[Dec. 30th, 2006|11:58 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  lethargic | ] |
 "we are most vulnerable to people we love. because in our giving so much love for them, we hand over the very weapon they could use to hurt us..."
i'm not an adventurer. my friends would all attest to that. i hate going on those distant trips. i don't like trying new sports (any sport, for that matter!) or activities. i'm not too keen on meeting new people. heck, i even avoid commuting.
but there's one thing i can say about myself. i am such a risk taker when it comes to *one* thing. ha. maybe that's why i don't have any other adventurous spirit left for all those other stuff.. |
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| blue is good |
[Dec. 26th, 2006|07:01 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  thankful | ] |
parang hindi masyadong masaya ang pasko 2006. hindi ko alam kung bakit.. pero parang karamihan ng tao, kundi malungkot.. walang gana.
kulang siguro sa pera. hahahahaha :p
but though this holiday is not as cheery as the past ones, i'd still like to wish everybody a *blessed and merry christmas season* :)
we all have a lot to be grateful for.. (amen to you, ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) iluvwills2003)
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| january came on christmas |
[Dec. 25th, 2006|06:52 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  excited | ] |
A CHRISTMAS LOVE SONG
Barbra Streisand all i want for christmas is you
you're the gift that's made my dreams all come true
all i need for christmas is here
finding every sweet surprise wrapped up in your eyes
waiting there for me underneath the tree
we'll spend the day exchanging kisses
smile and say "what a christmas this is"
long before the snowflakes appear
without bells or mistletoe or the tinsel's silver glow
you just look at me and oh!
christmas is here!
we will smile and say "what a christmas this is"
long before the snowflakes appear
without bells or mistletoe
or the tinsel's silver glow
you just have to look at me and oh!
christmas is here...  december 25th. hmmm. who'd have thought it would end so happily? :)
well.. the best gifts are yet to come, i suppose.
christmas is here.. and with it came january :x
ok, maybe not the *real* one..
but i can wait. i've had lots of practice.. :p
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| last day |
[Nov. 30th, 2006|02:08 pm] |
the last day of november. tomorrow, the christmas season "officially" starts. sheesh. how time flies! it's like the past year just zipped by.. barely giving me the chance to take a breath.
so much christmas shopping to do. so little time. not to mention "so little money" hahahaha!
if only it would rain money instead of water.. hehehe |
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| confessions of a procrastinator |
[Aug. 25th, 2006|09:48 am] |
waaaaaahhh!! AY2006-2007 is zipping by sooo fast, i hardly have any time to breathe.
the first quarter of the schoolyear is over. my advisees have taken the upcat. and today.. well, today, their first quarter grades are due. i haven't finished checking everything, though.. and i'm working double/triple time just to cram everything. *sigh*
ooops. which reminds me. i shouldn't be here updating my LJ while work awaits. wahahaha. this procrastinating thing sure is a bummer.. |
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| ho hum |
[Aug. 22nd, 2006|06:40 pm] |
i have NOT posted anything for the past months.
now, besides stating the obvious, i'm going to write down what's new with me right now..
NOTHING.
live with it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 5th, 2006|10:37 pm] |
What type of Fae are you?
hmm. when i first tried this out, i was a changeling. now i'm a nymph. hahaha. seems the first result was more accurate. i DO keep changing, huh?! :p
anyway.. just got home from our healing mass tonight. dad, mom and i ate dinner at misato (metrowalk). yumyum! gotta loooove their crazy maki :p now, i'm so full that i can't sleep yet. have to wait a couple more hours before catching those zzz's.
tomorrow's another early day. i still haven't finished the first chapter of that book i'm supposed to be writing. i've done some progress, though. i was able to finish ONE lesson. bwahahaha. great. well, actually, i'm done with two lessons.. but the second one's crappy.. so it doesn't really count. :p i HAVE to finish this one within the week. sj's gonna kill me :(
well, not much stuff to rant or rave about. things are kinda blah right now for me. there's not much excitement going around. sheesh. maybe that's the reason why i'm always so exhausted these days. oh well.. maybe soon i'll find something to fuel me hehehe >:)
oh. and i'm TRYING to learn how to put on makeup. my choir friends have been bugging me to practice applying some glam on my face. wahahaha. well, i suppose it's about time i exert effort putting some color to my face, hehe. i wonder if this will have any good effects on my lovelife, bwahahahaha :p
great. another senseless and boring blog post. you'd think that after a long hibernation i'd have something more interesting to write. *sigh* welcome to my boring life.. |
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| the highlights of my week |
[Jul. 5th, 2006|01:05 pm] |
dahil mukhang unti-unting natutuyo ang aking creative juices, ito na lang ang ipo-post ko muna, hehehe:
* ma'am portia found a live baby snake on the floor of our faculty room last monday. my little friend aya and i named the fella "CJ".. and it was officially my pet for 5 hours. sir banjo took it home with him in the afternoon. i hope he didn't kill it..
* my allergic rhinitis is bothering me again. my nose is all clogged up and i just ran out of nasal spray. stupid weather.
* i still have not submitted my portion of the geometry textbook raq and i are writing. sj has been hounding me since sunday. damn. i alternate between feelings of guilt and indifference. nyahahaha.
* zee has been keeping in touch. yeah, well.. those texts always are the highlights of my day.
* sam and i are okay now. i hope a repeat of last friday/saturday will not happen hehehe.
* heidi invited me and lian to an overnight stay at a hotel this coming weekend. hmmm. it would be nice to have some time off from duties..
well, so much for "highlights" of my week. i've been reading my friends' posts here at LJ this morning. i had a couple of laughs. i just *love* reading bo's posts, hahaha. i seriously miss those guys :( (o ayan ha.. hindi lang '06 ang ibig kong sabihin this time, hehehe). their weirdness and insanity are sorely missed in upis.
hmm. sanny also sent me some nice lyrics today. thought i'd post them here.. just to add to the blabber..
the luckiest
(ben folds five)
I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here
And where was I before the day
That I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
What if I'd been born fifty years before you
In a house on a street where you lived?
Maybe I'd be outside as you passed on your bike
Would I know?
And in a white sea of eyes
I see one pair that I recognize
And I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you
Next door there's an old man who lived to his nineties
And one day passed away in his sleep
And his wife; she stayed for a couple of days
And passed away
I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong
That I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest
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| my weekends are nonexistent |
[Jun. 30th, 2006|11:33 pm] |
it's almost 12mn and i still can't sleep. ha. well, what else is new?! i *always* get to sleep early. as in "wee hours of the morning" early hahaha.
in my previous post, i mentioned that i missed '06 peeps. well.. yeah, i miss them. 'coz they're the ones who most recently graduated from upis. but i miss '05.. '04.. '03.. etc. people too. so there. wala nang magtatampo, okei? :p
tomorrow (and also on sunday) i'll be serving at our growth in the spirit seminar. i still have a lot of papers to check (mostly my math10 papers - mathematical induction proofs. ugh) i also have to make a long exam for my geom class on monday (and a similar one for my tuesday classes). i hope i can squeeze all that in during the service, hehe :p
still no progress on that lousy textbook writing thingy. damn, why is it so difficult to write a geometry lesson anyway?! i'm not really dumb at writing. hmm. maybe i'm really just lazy. or disinterested. or both. i don't know. but i sure don't want to bump into sj right now. i'd be soooooo embarrassed :(
my soulmate's been hiding from me (and other entities) today. i don't know why. it's really weird.. not having her around, i mean. i'm not feeling sad or anything. but not having her to text/chat/talk to leaves me feeling.. hmm.. too "normal" hahaha :p i'm not used to this. feels like my weird side took a vacation and left me with.. uh.. a very boring "normal" me :p i hope she's back to normal by tomorrow.
i'm also missing z right now. well.. i always do, anyway. even when we're together, i miss him. but i'm not feeling that insanely desperate longing to be with him. i don't feel empty either. i'm just.. ME! dispassionate. indifferent. bored.
this has been a very different day. hahahaha. i need help :p |
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| lahat ng kakilala ko sinasabi pumapayat ako |
[Jun. 29th, 2006|07:15 pm] |
well, i guess it's true.. though i swear i'm not on a diet.
the past two weeks have been *really* stressful for me. problems with work, health and other stuff. *sigh*
anyway, i've missed updating my LJ. it's only now that i got the chance to check out what's new with my LJ friends.
lots of new things going on in my life. unfortunately, i don't have much energy to share them with everybody right now.
i posted some pix at my blogspot blog, though. you might wanna look at them choir studio pix =p
more later. i miss the '06 peeps.. :'( |
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| somebody teach me how to cry |
[Jun. 8th, 2006|09:00 pm] |
"my world has suffered an implosion, but unlike a black hole, it does not attract what i desire... how like my falling hair things are falling away from me. like a tired planet, i have lost my gravity... things are flying away from me. i have been flying too... flying towards you, but it only gives me this vertigo."
soulmate sent me this quote yesterday. and i claim them for my own. for truly, they may as well be my own words.
i hate melodrama.. almost as much as i hate myself. but sometimes it's inescapable. especially in moments such as this :(
i've forgotten how to cry. the last time i shed tears was around 5 months ago. but he taught me how to keep everything bottled up inside. so nobody else sees how i feel. so nobody else would know. and now here i am.. almost half a year later.. unable to shed a single drop of tear. only my emoticons are capable of crying :'(
oh hell. what's the point?! i'm gonna sleep this off. and maybe.. mercifully.. i won't wake up.
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| practice makes perfect..? |
[Jun. 1st, 2006|10:21 pm] |
they say practice makes perfect. but if that is so.. i should be doing really, really well by now. but nooooo. better, yes. but i couldn't even say i'm doing ok. let alone doing well.
so this is how it is. happiness is so fleeting.. and the human mind has such a short memory. oh well.
what a vicious cycle. dammit i can't write coherently. i can't even think straight. breathe.. breathe.. omg i need to breathe..
"i just wanted to write you a love poem.. but i can only live one for you." |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 16th, 2006|11:31 pm] |
it's raining once again. and in spite of my exhaustion, frustration and panic, i cannot help but smile :)
i don't know why, but there's really something magical about the rain for me. i LOOOOOOOVE the rain. very much.
'nuf said. i'm off to dreamland for a date with my rain.. <3 |
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| what a surprise |
[May. 14th, 2006|08:27 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  insane | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "have you ever needed someone so bad" - def leppard | ] |
You Should Be a Song Writer
You have the ability to evoke emotion, tell a story, and hook someone...
In a very small amount of words, perhaps with some deft rhyming.
Even if you can't write music, you can sure write compelling lyrics.
Lyrics so good, people will have them stuck in their heads!
hahaha. so i should be a songwriter?! wahaha. yeah, right. the past days' events were all so freaky, i actually felt myself plunging into depression this morning. well, thankfully i'm feeling a lot better now. i don't know about this coming week, though. i mean, my sked for the next few days is absolutely crazy!!! shuttling from makati to ortigas to makati.. lectures from morning 'til afternoon then choir practice in the evening.. *sigh* i don't want to complain.. but my sked really scares the sh*t out of me. i hope i don't fall to pieces before this weekend's LSS. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 12th, 2006|01:12 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sick | ] |
i'm staying home today. i cancelled my lecture at lsc ortigas at the last minute 'coz i couldn't even get up from bed. my body's aching. probably due to all my activities these past days. oh well.
so right now i'm listening to my zen micro songs (yes!! i *finally* got it back yesterday - they replaced the unit hehe, so it's now my same old brand new mp3 player haha).. chatting with sam and san.. fiddling with my new phone.. browsing the web.. and basically just being inert (except for my hands, obviously).
i wish i could go out, though. i mean, it's the first *real* rain of summer and i couldn't even go out to enjoy it :(
nothing much to post right now. just rambling 'coz i'm quite bored. oh well. some day this is. hmm. i'll just post the lyrics i'm listening to right now.
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| (no subject) |
[May. 11th, 2006|10:18 am] |
the past three days have been *extremely* hectic and tiring for me. feels like i've been having one very looooong day since i woke up tuesday morning. hahaha.
some summer this is turning out to be. absolutely no time for rest/recreation. not yet at least. so i'm looking forward to our family's post-mother's day celebration on the 27th hehe :p we'll be going to 'isdaan'
there's nothing for me to post publicly here at the moment. just check out my main blog at blogspot for updates on my boring life hehehe |
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| words of wisdom |
[May. 4th, 2006|08:14 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | cynical | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the best thing that you never had | ] |
this is the piece of advice i received this morning in my cell phone:
Forget an ex. Talk to him to clarify things. Be sure to have closure. Have time for yourself. Take up a new hobby. Read a book or go on outdoor activities. Indulge yourself - facial, shopping, or whatever makes you feel good. Work harder or focus more on your studies. In the meantime, lose contact with him - no text or phone calls. When time has healed your wounds, then chances are you can be friends again.
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.. =p
ok, so i'm passing on this piece of advice to whoever wants to take it. this is definitely not for me.. |
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| to the depths |
[Apr. 28th, 2006|11:54 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
 "what power would hell have if those there imprisoned were not able to dream of heaven?"
- lord morpheus, preludes & nocturnes (sandman vol. 1)
you know what's worse than suffering and torment? it's suffering and torment with a view of paradise. and that's why i certainly agree with morpheus on this one. dreams are double-edged swords. they can lift you up and enable you to soar to great heights. but they can also skewer your heart and bring you down to the greatest depths with the realization of what they truly are - mere illusion.
the twins desire and despair perfectly illustrate my point. and you can alternate from one state to the other without realizing what's happening to you until it's too late.. :( |
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| *grinning widely* |
[Apr. 25th, 2006|09:53 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  content | ] |
i've always been of the opinion that if you want something desperately enough.. and you wish for it hard enough, you *will* get it. it's not a matter of whether it will be given to you or not. it's simply a matter of time.
anyway. so far my theory still holds. yup. after a looooooong time, my wish has come true. zahir and i are ok now. i mean, we're back to "normal" again (though what, to us, is normal may not necessarily be so for most people). he's talking to me again.. and we sms each other just as we did before. we're open with each other.. and we can talk about anything and everything under the sun.
ok, so it's not such an earth-shaking thing for most people. but it is for me. and i'm happy. i really am :) and though i know someday i just might shed copious tears again because of him.. for now i just want to cherish the moment. 'coz times like these do not come as often as i want them to. |
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"we are most vulnerable to people we love. because in our giving so much love for them, we hand over the very weapon they could use to hurt us..."
